Author Archives: Richard William Morris

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LEGO Movie Review

Emmet proudly buys an overpriced coffee in The LEGO Movie

As promised, we’re bringing you a short but sweet review of The LEGO Movie which we went to go and see at the Lincoln ODEON.

Basically, it’s great as we thought it was going to be. It isn’t quite as spectacular as all the critics are making it out to be, but in all seriousness it is a great family film.

Even when we say ‘family’ we mean that lightly. There are so many jokes which are suitable for grown-ups in this film that really you should have no shame as a young student or young person in general without children in going and seeing this film.

Only issue is that people seem to be labouring under the impression that it is a film just for kids, so parents are taking their children to see it. This is annoying.

There’s a point in the film where the main character, Emmet, really does hit a jeopardy point and this young child next to us started to cry. It was rather irritating. We wanted to tell the parents to shut it up but then the situation is rather quickly resolved so fortunately the little shit only ruined about 180 seconds of the movie for us.

It does end with the stereotypical American ending which is everyone looking ‘bleary-eyed’ and ‘proud’ as some characters save the day, but it is great. The end is also begging for a sequel, which it looks as though Warner Brothers may have already confirmed. We’re pleased about this.

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How Abraham Lincoln Is Ruining Our Business

Photo of Abraham Lincoln.

‘Why does this matter, and what are you on about?’ I can hear you asking.

Well.

Click this, and see what the problem is.

It turns out that Abraham Lincoln was way ahead of his time and basically decided to ruin our chances of ever getting a successful site.

The issue is that in transcripts and works about the Gettysburg address, he says “and that” a few times, couple that with the word “Lincoln” and bingo, that’s our problem.

The problem isn’t quite as bad if you use Google UK, but still. Look at how sneaky he’s being, getting in there below us.

Basically, what we’re saying is that Abraham Lincoln was an arse. Not only was he American, he was an arse.

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There’s Going To Be A New “River Island”

This is the old River Island store, soon to be shut.

If you’ve had the joy of walking along the High Street in the past couple of weeks, you’ll notice that there is a major construction project happening near the Lloyds Bank and opposite(ish) Boots.

THERE’S GOING TO BE A NEW RIVER ISLAND.

So, if you’re like me, and fancy spending £30 on a single shirt, then you’re in luck.

I tend to find it is the kind of shop I only want to go in once I’ve got some gift vouchers, but fortunately my family have cottoned onto this to the extent that one Christmas present is always a voucher for said shop.

At the moment in store there’s a lot of shirts with pictures of Amsterdam (through various Instagram filters) with the word “AMSTERDAM” emblazoned over the top of it in some hipster fonts, so if you’re a fan of that kind of thing, be my guest (I’m not, I have terrible fashion sense, I can basically just about pull together some colours as a “theme”…and that’s me being generous about my own abilities).

It also says outside the new store that they are “recruiting”, but they’re not, I did a search and there are no jobs available at all at the new store. SO IT’S ALL LIES.

I wanted to get a Saturday job so I could graduate with at least some level of money, but apparently they don’t want Fashion Supremo Richard Morris working for them.

As I went to hit “Schedule” on this post, I was made aware that in fact The Lincolnite, a more serious and boring news source, has already done a story on this, so if you want to be bored to death click here.

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Have You Played… The LEGO Franchise Games?

A PlayStation controller made of LEGO.

What I mean by this is the LEGO Harry Potter, LEGO Star Wars, Batman, Lord of the Rings etc. games.

I am actually blown away by how good these games are.

I’ll put my hands up and admit something, I am not a gamer at all. I have a Wii and a PS3, but the former is only for parties and friends coming round, and the latter is mostly used for Netflix and iPlayer, and occasional playing of the SSX franchise, with a few blu-rays thrown in.

I recently had the joy of playing around with a friend’s Xbox One for a few hours (it’s a nice piece of kit), I tried a few different games, Forza Sport (racing, unbelievable graphics), Assassin’s Creed (I discovered I’m not very good at this), and LEGO Marvel Superheroes.

The last of those three had me playing for two and a half hours before I even realised any time had passed.

Despite being a kids game, the whole format is basically a 3D platform game in which you become different Marvel characters in order to solve puzzles in the form of LEGO bricks, and while it is a kids game, it is unbelievably addictive.

It’s also rather amusing, and has some wry comments towards the real movies, such as when Spiderman says to Iron Man, “Wait a second, the Hulk can’t go through small spaces? That’s a plot hole from the films”.

The games are only around £15 in GAME, the same price on Amazon. They’re well worth a look at if you fancy a few hours killing in between essay work.

Here’s a video of Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone as told through LEGO Game cutscenes, I love the humour.

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Burns Night Was Last Night

The Liam Robinson Dance Band perform a song.

So how did we at L&T (which we’re increasingly calling ourselves during office meetings, no idea why, it sounds like a Lemonade & Tonic which would be awful), celebrate Burns Night?

Well we didn’t.

The Liam Robinson Dance Band perform a song.

The Liam Robinson Dance Band. Photo Credit: Richard Morris.

We did awkwardly go along to an event at the Lincoln Drill Hall which was in honour of the late poet Robert Burns (well, me and Alice did).

The event was organised by Liam Robinson, who is in charge of a band called “The Liam Robinson Dance Band“, unfortunately he doesn’t play sick David Guetta beats, but he does play some amazing Scottish Ceilidh dancing songs, which is just as good. Not.

It all involved dancing, singing and poetry. The first two of those things that I just wrote actually involved some level of audience participation. Imagine the awkward glances exchanged between myself and Alice as we realised that neither of us knew the lyrics to these traditional folk songs being sung.

Also the dancing was amazing. Alice got to dance with a rather elderly Scottish gentleman, and I had to dance with his wife, who was Canadian-Scottish. They were both surprisingly strong for their age and I was afraid at one moment of “Whipping The Willow” that I would in fact let go and go flying across the room.

Fear not, dear reader, that did not happen, your author is safe for now.

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Pixie Lott Has Got Some New Songs Out

This is a picture of Pixie Lott singing.

And they’re really rather good. The first one is called “Heart Cry”, and is a classic Pixie Lott love song, quite a slow beat, and definitely going to be one of those songs which is either on the beginning or end of the forthcoming album, but nice nonetheless.

The other song she’s released is called “Nasty”. I don’t know if she’s going through some sort of ‘third album sexual suggestiveness’ or something here, but it is rather a departure from her previous work.

Prior to this the most sexually suggestive thing she’d done was “What Do You Take Me For”, which was really quite on the line for someone with such a clean image.

Anyway, we’re unashamedly excited for the new album (well I say we, I am, Guppy won’t be, Alice won’t be, and I have no idea of Emily and Luke’s musical tastes at all, but websites like this tend to say “we” a lot so I thought it would be appropriate).

It is nice to hear a song which is aimed at ‘the clubs’ but actually has some level of jazz and trumpets in it though isn’t it.

Also there’s a bit where she gets a little ‘strong’ and goes off the notes (at 2:07) and I don’t like that bit, but other than that it’s a good song, and a worthy addition to any Pixie Lott fan’s repertoire.

I still kind of definitely fancy her quite a lot, which is odd for a gay man, I am aware.